02-01-2019 Roger Castillo – be clear on what’s being sought.

00:07
so the content of the talks is about
00:12
something very specific nothing that is
00:16
said is about anything other than this
00:19
subject and the subject is in practical
00:22
terms happiness for the human being in
00:26
daily life and happiness for the human
00:30
being turns out not to be happiness in
00:33
the form that most of humanity believes
00:36
it to be happiness is not happiness to
00:39
be found in outcomes or circumstance
00:42
that is what we could call pleasure the
00:46
flow of life circumstance is always
00:48
either pleasure or pain but it turns out
00:50
that the happiness that is available for
00:53
the human being
00:54
happiness which is available on a
00:56
continuous unbroken basis is happiness
01:00
through peace of mind that means that
01:05
our happiness is not dependent on
01:08
circumstance because our happiness is
01:12
our attitude to circumstance so this is
01:22
very good news
01:23
because if our happiness was dependent
01:25
on circumstance if our happiness was a
01:28
happiness of pleasure pleasure pleasure
01:30
pleasure
01:31
it wouldn’t take that much contemplating
01:35
to realize that that happiness isn’t
01:38
available for the human being we just
01:40
need to look at the flow of life
01:43
circumstance and see that circumstance
01:46
is never going to be in our control
01:48
there are too many factors people will
01:52
do what they’re designed to do not what
01:55
we want them to do people that we love
01:58
are going to get sick and die we’re
02:04
going to miss aeroplanes all of these
02:08
things are part of circumstance and
02:11
they’re often going to be out of line
02:13
with our preferences so with a little
02:18
contemplation we’d see that actually I
02:20
can never control life such that it is
02:22
pleasure pleasure pleasure pleasure and
02:26
as we realize that our happiness is not
02:29
actually to be found in life being
02:32
pleasure pleasure pleasure then our
02:34
relationship to life can change it turns
02:38
out that the relationship to life when
02:41
there is a deeply ingrained belief that
02:43
my happiness is to be found in outcomes
02:45
in pleasure in circumstance it turns out
02:49
that when that’s our relationship to
02:51
life we are continually disturbed
02:57
internally resisting life when it
03:00
doesn’t turn out the way that we would
03:02
like it to so when our attitude is that
03:07
my happiness is dependent on life being
03:10
a certain way not only is there the
03:14
inevitable pain that life will deliver
03:18
through circumstance but on top of that
03:21
there is this load of suffering an
03:23
attitudinal resistance to life not
03:27
delivering what I want all of the time
03:35
and if we start to reassess what life is
03:42
and what my happiness is the happiness
03:47
that to be frank is what spiritual
03:51
wisdom teachings have been talking about
03:54
for thousands of years so once we
03:58
reassess this and start seeing things
04:00
more clearly the whole system starts to
04:04
change the attachment to outcomes that
04:09
I’m speaking of the attachment to
04:11
outcomes really means the deeply
04:14
ingrained belief that my happiness my
04:15
completeness is to be found out there in
04:19
the future when things all line up
04:21
perfectly so that’s what attachment or
04:23
outcomes really means so as everything
04:27
is reassessed the attachment to outcome
04:29
starts to diminish because we realize
04:32
that doesn’t make sense and as that
04:35
starts to diminish we start to find that
04:38
the resistance towards life starts to
04:40
change there’s a direct correlation
04:43
between the attachment to outcome and
04:48
the resistance we have towards life so
04:55
we can have the best of intention of
04:57
let’s say being more accepting but if we
05:01
don’t realize where our non acceptance
05:03
comes from and if that route isn’t
05:08
affected isn’t changed then with the
05:12
best of intention the acceptance isn’t
05:15
going to be there because the non
05:16
acceptance will keep arising and we
05:19
might get we’ll get frustrated at that
05:22
frustrated at the fact that I have this
05:24
really great intention to be more
05:29
accepting maybe if I say not even for my
05:31
own benefit but for the benefit of the
05:33
others those around me and yet I can’t
05:35
that the non accepting just keeps
05:41
arising and so we feel like there’s a
05:43
sense of failure like I can’t be
05:48
accepting
05:49
and the reason is because one the the
05:52
the main point here is that we don’t do
05:54
acceptance we don’t do anything in life
05:57
life happens and that needs to be part
06:00
of the attitude that kicks in so not
06:03
only an attitude that no longer sees my
06:06
happiness to be found in outcomes but an
06:08
attitude that also sees that what is
06:10
happening in life is not my doing and
06:14
not the doing of the other what it means
06:18
is that what happens through me is a
06:22
result of everything that life has put
06:25
in place everything that’s come before
06:27
and what’s happening through the other
06:29
as a result of everything life has put
06:32
in place so we’re all instruments
06:34
essentially through which life happens
06:38
we’re instruments of God if you want to
06:41
put it that way or instruments of life
06:43
we’re not separate from life we’ve been
06:46
spawned from life designed and
06:50
conditioned by life and in each moment
06:53
we function the functioning feels like
06:56
it’s my doing then the interpretation
06:59
the deeply ingrained beliefs is I’m the
07:02
one that has failed or succeeded in life
07:05
the other is the one that had complete
07:08
free will to act the way that they acted
07:11
and that they should have and could have
07:13
acted differently so this attitude of
07:20
attachment to outcome and the adjoining
07:24
attitude of personal doership which
07:26
means seeing everything that’s happening
07:28
is either my doing or the others doing
07:30
and seeing the person as a separate
07:35
independent entity insulated from life
07:41
entity with its own complete volition
07:46
that’s the attitude of separation that
07:49
doesn’t really exist in life
08:04
when we look at the major religions at
08:07
the core of the major religion religions
08:10
is a theme and that theme we could sum
08:16
up as God’s will
08:20
so in Islam there’s inshallah God
08:24
willing in Christianity thy will be done
08:26
in hindu hinduism it
08:31
ramesh used to say it says the same
08:33
thing but in a more profound way it says
08:35
thou art the speaker and thou art the
08:37
listener meaning God is everything
08:40
God is both the speaker and the listener
08:43
God has become the manifestation God has
08:48
become the story of life so God didn’t
08:51
become the story of life meaning the
08:53
rivers in the mountains and the roads
08:55
and the trees and then all the people
08:58
are sort of additions but that’s not
09:01
what God is
09:03
it means God became the whole story from
09:07
beginning to end which means you me and
09:09
everyone else all of whom are acting
09:17
functioning exactly according to life
09:22
now this is essentially non-duality
09:26
addressed from a practical daily living
09:29
perspective so non duality as it’s
09:35
presented from the top-down perspective
09:38
will focus on you our consciousness you
09:42
our awareness and that’s very powerful
09:46
because it allows certain shifts to
09:50
happen shifts of identity
09:59
it will make certain suggestions within
10:03
those teachings of witnessing as the
10:07
formless awareness that you are
10:09
everything that’s happening and
10:14
sometimes if we don’t have a frame of
10:16
reference to let a consciousness or
10:21
awareness and what is this consciousness
10:23
that I am I don’t know them it can be
10:26
very frustrating listening to these
10:28
teachings that intuitively we censor
10:32
telling us the truth or pointing us in
10:35
the right direction and yet something’s
10:39
missing that that bit within our own
10:42
experiences that allows us to connect
10:44
and experientially see what’s being
10:48
pointed at so there is just as valid an
10:52
approach which is to take the non dual
10:55
teachings especially if there’s a deep
10:58
understanding of what that methodology
11:01
is actually trying to bring about and
11:05
approach it from a practical daily
11:07
living perspective because practical
11:11
daily living is everyone’s experience so
11:15
if we can put forward pointers which
11:17
come from the same understanding
11:19
pointers that support support the
11:24
perspective of life that is said to be
11:27
let’s say more accurate less filled with
11:30
illusion or ignorance and ignorance or
11:34
illusion that we didn’t put in place but
11:37
that is part of life if we can approach
11:41
it from practical daily living
11:43
perspective then maybe some of the
11:45
blocks that weren’t able to be overcome
11:51
by the pointers from a different
11:54
perspective can actually be overcome so
11:57
if we can bring together the two
12:00
teachings the top-down and the bottom-up
12:02
teachings of non duality we have a very
12:05
powerful potent mix
12:14
so someone commented recently on one of
12:20
the YouTube videos they said what I’m
12:22
hearing is simply mechanics and biology
12:27
and something else
12:31
um psychology probably they said past
12:36
offers spirituality and I completely
12:41
understand why they might make that
12:43
mistake because it’s fair to say that
12:47
when we get into spiritual teachings
12:49
they’re often talking about what we
12:51
don’t have direct experience of and
12:56
there are lots of statements and
13:00
comments about what truth is what we are
13:02
and we can the human beings tend to
13:09
believe things very easily we tend to
13:13
believe what sounds right and so we can
13:19
form an idea about what spiritual
13:21
transformation is and might actually be
13:26
missing the essence of what it’s about
13:29
like what is it about in practical terms
13:31
I think what are we really looking for
13:37
so in some processes because the way
13:47
that we function as a human being is so
13:49
filled with this doer ship and
13:52
attachment to outcome we sort of told
13:54
that the person isn’t real
13:58
we’re told that life isn’t real it’s an
14:01
illusion it’s an appearance in
14:03
consciousness it’s all a dream and that
14:07
that’s what we need to realize and so we
14:10
can become obsessed with that
14:13
realization we can become obsessed with
14:17
the methodology in the process
14:20
thinking that’s what it’s all about but
14:24
what does that realization bring about
14:27
in practical terms what does it deliver
14:29
in practical terms that’s very important
14:33
for us to recognize because otherwise we
14:36
might find that we’re getting caught up
14:39
in a process and losing track of what
14:46
it’s really about
14:47
and so the suggestion here is that what
14:51
it’s really about
14:52
in practical terms is the end of
14:54
suffering so various realizations and
14:57
insights along the way I’m not there
15:00
because in and of themselves the
15:03
realization is what it’s about but
15:05
rather they’re there because when we
15:08
have certain realizations when we see
15:10
things from a different perspective
15:11
the subsequent implication of that
15:14
realization what that means what it
15:18
means to our ingrained beliefs is that
15:22
it has an effect it can have an effect
15:25
on those ingrained beliefs they can be
15:27
seen when life is seen from this
15:29
different perspective to be inaccurate
15:31
and they have been fall away and what
15:34
happens when the beliefs fall away when
15:37
the beliefs fall away certain
15:40
consequences of those beliefs fall away
15:42
and when we look at suffering we find
15:44
it’s very much based on an deeply
15:46
ingrained set of beliefs so the
15:49
realizations are really there to help
15:52
undo the beliefs because life is seen
15:55
from a different way and then it’s seen
15:57
I can’t believe x y&z; anymore it doesn’t
16:01
make sense from this new perspective of
16:04
seeing life and as a result of the
16:08
belief falling away then the suffering
16:10
falls away so really it’s not about the
16:13
insights per se it’s about what the
16:16
insights what effect they have so
16:19
keeping this in mind what are we really
16:22
looking for in life we’re looking for
16:27
what enlightenment if we want to put a
16:30
name to it liberation
16:32
actually delivers
16:34
we’re looking for peace of mind in daily
16:38
living and peace of mind is the end of
16:40
suffering so a peace of mind isn’t
16:43
actually the addition of something it’s
16:47
not gaining anything
16:48
it’s what’s there naturally when a
16:52
certain layer of thinking falls away a
16:56
certain layer of thinking about life
16:58
about our role in life about our
17:01
successes and failures in life a certain
17:04
type of thinking that’s obsessed with
17:06
the past and the future a certain type
17:08
of thinking that is blaming the other
17:10
all the time for what they did or didn’t
17:12
do
17:13
feeling shame for what I did or didn’t
17:16
do having expectations of how life will
17:19
turn out and so if that’s the background
17:22
thinking that’s in place because of
17:27
certain belief systems then the pieces
17:31
covered up and so the pieces reveals
17:38
when that thinking starts to dissolve so
17:42
really the process is about losing not
17:44
gaining it’s not about becoming more
17:49
complete we’re already complete that’s
17:52
why it’s often called a cruel joke we’re
17:55
off seeking for something that is
17:59
already right here but in practice it’s
18:02
here but it’s not here because it’s
18:04
covered up so the process is really
18:07
about removing removing the veil
18:10
removing what is covering up our true
18:13
nature you could say the piece that
18:16
we’re looking for
18:35
so if peace of mind which in this
18:39
framework conceptual framework because
18:42
everything I’m putting forward is a
18:43
concept concepts you could look at as
18:47
descriptions or theories that are
18:53
describing something so don’t believe
18:56
the concepts but use them as pointers so
19:01
that you can verify what the concepts
19:03
say for yourself as if we don’t verify
19:06
the concept for ourselves then we end up
19:09
in the same dilemma that was there
19:14
before the seeking started which is
19:16
believing things without actually
19:20
knowing it so the pointers are pointing
19:23
to daily life in order for us to say let
19:27
me check this out let me see if this
19:29
holds true and as you check it out for
19:32
yourself and you put a tick next to the
19:35
concept and then another tick because it
19:36
keeps it needs to be checked out many
19:38
times because they all turn the other
19:42
belief the other way of seeing life is
19:44
very deeply ingrained as we start
19:47
checking off the concept the
19:49
understanding starts to go deeper and
19:51
deeper and as it goes deeper and deeper
19:53
it starts uprooting the misunderstanding
19:57
the misunderstanding essentially about
19:59
what we are what the other is and what
20:03
life is so everything I put forward is a
20:09
concept so for example the statement
20:12
that says what we’re really looking for
20:14
in life whether we realize it or not is
20:18
peace of mind concept don’t take it as
20:24
truth but it’s a pointer it’s it’s the
20:27
basis of content that contemplation can
20:30
happen on so luckily I think these
20:34
concepts are fairly simple put forward
20:38
not in Sanskrit not in deep scientific
20:43
terms but in simple plain everyday
20:45
English so the starting concept
20:48
what we’re really looking for is
20:50
happiness but happiness is not the
20:53
happiness that we thought it was not
20:55
happiness through pleasure pleasure
20:57
pleasure but happiness through peace of
20:59
mind
21:00
so hopefully the internet can say okay
21:02
I’ve registered that concept I
21:05
understand what it means but then the
21:08
intellect might also say hang on a sec
21:10
you said um we’re looking for happiness
21:13
happiness is not what I and humanity is
21:16
generally looking for which is so forms
21:19
of pleasure but peace of mind so what
21:21
exactly is this peace of mind because if
21:23
we run around with a word as part of the
21:28
concept but we don’t understand the word
21:30
clearly then we don’t understand the
21:31
concept clearly so it’s saying peace of
21:34
mind is not something it’s not a feeling
21:37
of bliss or ecstasy peace of mind is
21:39
simply the experience of life when
21:43
suffering is not there so a peace of
21:46
mind is the end of suffering so that’s
21:50
another concept peace of mind is the end
21:52
of suffering now another concept is the
21:56
forms of suffering or suffering arises
22:00
in these forms in practical terms guilt
22:04
blame pride worry and anxiety
22:09
expectation and attachment to outcomes
22:12
so we could say that’s another concept
22:15
and then I’ll give you another concept
22:18
which explains what blame is hopefully
22:23
our intellect understands that a concept
22:26
is never really the thing itself the
22:28
thing itself is very complex it can’t be
22:32
put into words actually so gravity is
22:36
gravity doesn’t require a concept in
22:41
order for it to be but then we have a
22:44
concept of gravity which describes
22:47
gravity in a way that is useful for us
22:49
so we have a concept of gravity that
22:52
says okay gravity is on earth a force
22:55
that attracts
22:57
object towards the ground at a
23:00
acceleration speed of 9.8 m/s^2 that’s
23:05
sort of part of the concept of gravity
23:09
it’s not gravity itself but it allows us
23:14
to understand gravity versus pressure
23:17
for example a different force in physics
23:19
so the concept about blame is blame is
23:33
our attitude of doer ship personal
23:39
doership towards actions that the other
23:44
have delivered and outcomes that the out
23:47
that have been delivered as a result of
23:50
the other person’s actions that are
23:53
painful painful means not in line with
23:57
our biological preference so blame is
24:01
the attitude towards the other for what
24:04
they have done that has hurt me an
24:06
attitude that sees the other as the doer
24:10
of the action an attitude that says you
24:15
have hurt me you could have and you
24:17
should have done it differently but you
24:19
didn’t so I hate you essentially that is
24:22
blame and underneath blame there are
24:25
lots of different forms of blame you can
24:27
have hatred for someone you can have
24:30
resentment for someone you can have
24:32
everyday ordinary blame because they I
24:36
don’t know didn’t lock your car or they
24:38
finish the milk and then replace it
24:41
there is jealousy so lots of different
24:45
forms of blame guilt is an attitude
24:53
towards those actions that happen
24:54
through me that I see is my actions
24:58
because I see myself as the doer as a
25:01
separate independent entity in control
25:03
of everything I think feels say and do
25:07
and it’s usually in relation and
25:11
attitude in relation to actions that
25:13
have delivered a painful outcome to
25:15
myself or to someone else and then I say
25:18
well I have delivered pain to myself or
25:21
someone else which is an attack on what
25:23
I’m looking for it’s an attack on my
25:25
happiness and so I hate myself I feel
25:31
not good enough that’s what guilt is I’m
25:33
I’m guilty I’m not good enough I didn’t
25:35
do it well enough and then on the guilt
25:41
there are a whole lot of sub types of
25:45
guilt lack of self-worth insecurity
25:51
embarrassment guilt for you know simple
25:56
things that we might not have done being
26:00
good enough friend or and essentially it
26:06
all comes down to seeing oneself in a
26:09
light that is not good enough
26:20
and pride is the same attitude of
26:24
personal doership that sees those
26:28
actions that happen through me the
26:31
positive actions that happen through me
26:33
and claim personal ownership over there
26:36
and they look what I have achieved
26:37
look how good I am so it’s a milder form
26:42
of suffering yet what we’ll find is that
26:46
all of these forms of suffering based on
26:52
the idea I am the doer and the other is
26:54
the doer are based on a false idea of
26:58
who we are so although it’s a milder
27:01
form of suffering because it’s pride is
27:04
in relation to those actions that are
27:06
positive essentially it is still a
27:12
belief in the system that is out of line
27:15
with what we really are and so that
27:17
means it covers up the piece that is
27:22
available when we know what we are at
27:25
our core
27:36
now I think it’s fair to say that the
27:40
description that’s being put forward
27:41
that the human being is not the doer
27:46
right doesn’t mean that actions don’t
27:49
happen through us and that things don’t
27:50
get done clearly that’s what life is
27:52
life we are always doing things on a
27:55
certain level there we are functioning
27:57
but doer ship means that the the belief
28:02
in personal doership
28:03
is an attitude to what is happening
28:08
through us that is interpreted as
28:11
something that me as a separate
28:14
independent entity have done now so
28:23
what’s being suggested is there is no
28:26
separate independent entity so any
28:29
belief about what we are that is seeing
28:35
yourself as a separate independent
28:36
entity is essentially a misunderstanding
28:39
of who we are it’s what if you if
28:47
anyone’s come across the teachings of
28:48
Ramana Maharshi he would refer to as the
28:51
small self or the self with the small s
28:54
it’s a self image that is out of line
28:59
with the self which is that which exists
29:04
and is covered up by this false self
29:08
image
29:15
one of his course statements goes
29:20
something along the lines of this that
29:22
everything that happens happens
29:24
according to the great or Dana the body
29:26
functions according to its body Karma
29:30
that if something is destined to happen
29:38
according to the great or Dana if
29:42
something is destined to have and no
29:44
matter what force in the universe tries
29:46
to prevent it from happening it will
29:48
still happen if something is not
29:51
destined to happen no matter what force
29:53
in the universe tries to make it happen
29:56
it will not happen and so with this
30:00
understanding of life the best course of
30:04
action is to remain silent
30:06
so the silence that is being referred to
30:09
here isn’t a silence of words but rather
30:13
a silence of the thinking mind that is
30:16
continually judging life as appropriate
30:20
or inappropriate should have happened
30:22
this way should have happened that way
30:23
with this understanding that thinking no
30:28
longer makes sense
30:33
but life as part of what is being
30:36
destined has decided not necessarily
30:41
decided as in the way that we think a
30:45
decision is made but as part of the
30:47
story of life life has inserted what we
30:50
could call a divine hypnosis we’re
30:55
generally a human being doesn’t see
30:57
themself as part of an unfolding of life
31:02
but has come to see themselves as a
31:06
separate independent entity so life has
31:09
put in place the seed on which suffering
31:12
arises so suffering when it arises is
31:15
happening because it’s destined to
31:17
happen God will in my opinion this is a
31:24
concept rent of God
31:28
that the concept might imply that there
31:31
is a god out there separate from us
31:34
separate from life but let’s say we hold
31:39
this sort of imaginary concept of God so
31:43
if when we die and we go and meet God
31:45
God is not going to say to you well you
31:48
didn’t do a very good job there and you
31:49
did a great job there he’s gonna give
31:51
you a high-five you know perfect work
31:54
you performed exactly as you were
31:57
designed to perform I designed you that
32:01
way
32:01
so I expected you to do everything that
32:04
you did at every moment in your life
32:09
that’s God’s attitude towards you and me
32:11
and everyone on earth and then
32:18
straightaway the thought is what about
32:21
all the rapists and murderers and all of
32:25
the poverty make sense that we asked
32:30
that question but we tend to ask that
32:32
question because of the deeply ingrained
32:34
attachment to pleasure pleasure pleasure
32:36
pleasure where when that is our
32:40
understanding of ourself life when it
32:43
delivers pain it simply isn’t acceptable
32:45
and so then the question comes up it
32:48
says no God wouldn’t design rapists and
32:52
murderers well are we sure what if God
32:58
has turned into the whole story of life
33:00
so God isn’t out there but God has
33:03
become this story of life and we only
33:07
know this story of life there could be
33:09
any number of other stories or ones that
33:13
come after him and the ones that cannot
33:15
come after it is still God turning into
33:17
that story of life so God could have
33:20
turned into a story that is all pleasure
33:22
and bliss right that one’s happened as
33:26
well
33:27
this one is this one this one is the the
33:31
story where God has turned into the
33:33
story of duality of interconnected
33:36
opposites of pleasure and
33:42
so it’s a identity that is attached to
33:46
pleasure pleasure pleasure and field’s
33:48
heavily assaulted and attacked when life
33:51
delivers pain that simply can’t accept
33:55
life as it is now that’s part of life
34:00
that non acceptance is part of life so
34:02
these explanations here are explanations
34:06
that hopefully become part of our
34:10
conditioning part of what we can refer
34:14
to as the working mind as opposed to the
34:16
thinking mind the thinking mind is the
34:19
part of the body mind organism that has
34:23
these false ideas about life and oneself
34:26
in them so that the thinking mind is
34:28
where all the suffering stems from where
34:31
the non-acceptance of life as it is
34:33
stems from the working mind is the
34:36
functional practical part of the
34:40
intellect and these talks are simply new
34:44
conditioning new conditioning that can
34:47
become part of the working mind and as
34:51
the working mind then goes through or as
34:54
the human goes through its day it starts
34:58
seeing daily life according to the
35:02
concepts that have been put forward the
35:04
concepts that have become part of the
35:06
working mind so the working mind is is
35:08
the functional part of the mind so the
35:11
part of the mind that would book a taxi
35:14
a certain number of hours before to pick
35:16
you up to take you to the airport it
35:19
calculates these things it knows how
35:20
much money to take on holiday it decides
35:23
what food to buy and it’s also the part
35:28
of the mind that starts to absorb
35:31
spiritual pointers spiritual teachings
35:34
and as the thinking mind pops up and
35:37
starts blaming the other the working
35:39
mind might say this is suffering because
35:43
the working mind has also been informed
35:46
equipped with a concept that says
35:48
suffering is an uncomfortableness with
35:50
oneself and uncomfortableness with the
35:52
other
35:53
an uncomfortableness that arises in the
35:55
form of guilt blame pride worry and
35:57
expectation all of which are based on
36:01
the premise that I am the doer and the
36:04
other is the doer and that my happiness
36:05
is to be found in outcomes all of which
36:09
not seeing that life is a unfolding
36:13
according to a much bigger picture that
36:15
you and I are intrinsically part of and
36:17
not in control of and so the working
36:22
mind when the suffering arises might
36:24
catch it and say look there is blame now
36:27
though these concepts are not saying
36:29
that we should resist suffering that we
36:31
should resist the false beliefs that
36:35
resistance is a job of the thinking mind
36:38
these are just descriptions and even a
36:41
description about something less
36:45
favorable or left less optimal is just a
36:48
description the doer ship in us the
36:51
attachment to outcome in us here’s a
36:53
description of something not so optimal
36:56
like a belief that leads to suffering
36:58
and it says okay I’m going to fix that
37:01
it’s not up to a doer to fix it because
37:05
the doer doesn’t exist the doer is just
37:07
a belief system that says I’m gonna fix
37:10
it so the working mind understands it’s
37:13
job is not to fix it what it’s doing is
37:17
just observing what’s happening
37:19
according to some information it’s being
37:23
given that allows it to now know the
37:26
sort of shape or flavor of certain
37:29
things so very much like a student a
37:32
science student that’s about to go out
37:34
on a field trip and before they’re let
37:38
out onto the field trip they’re given
37:39
descriptions about you know the blue
37:43
breasted J the certain lizard with a you
37:54
know forked tail and so all the
37:57
descriptions are given and then they’re
38:00
also told where to find those you know
38:02
under a rock or on in a certain tree and
38:06
then they see them and though that’s the
38:12
working moment say oh that’s the
38:13
such-and-such lizard and that’s the blue
38:16
breasted J and you don’t need to do
38:21
anything about you don’t have to catch
38:22
it or kill it it’s just to see it so the
38:28
working mind starts to see the thinking
38:32
mind in action and it start also starts
38:36
to pop up thoughts such as a thought
38:43
actually I’m not the doer and the other
38:46
is in the doer and the thinking mind
38:49
suffering the blame is saying you are
38:53
the doer you did this according to your
38:56
own free will your own volition as a
38:58
separate independent entity it delivered
39:01
pain to me and I hate you and the
39:04
working mind might say actually I’m not
39:06
the doer and the other isn’t the doer
39:07
and that thought that says I’m not the
39:10
doer and the other isn’t it has the
39:11
potential to cut off the suffering but
39:15
it’s not an intentional action to bring
39:20
about a certain outcome it’s just the
39:22
arising automatically of the the working
39:26
mind in action because the working mind
39:29
has been conditioned a certain way and
39:32
the consequence not our doing but just a
39:36
consequence of the working mind now
39:39
starting to function differently to the
39:41
thinking mind is that the beliefs that
39:44
the root of the thinking mind can start
39:46
to weaken so this isn’t actually a
39:50
process that you have to work hard on
39:52
you don’t have to leave the talk and get
39:57
to work diligently you have no homework
40:00
once you’ve once you leave
40:08
and with the attitude that you have
40:10
nothing to do except to function in each
40:14
moment exactly the way that you are
40:16
designed to function according to the
40:18
circumstance you find yourself in which
40:21
which isn’t really an instruction for
40:23
you to do it’s a description of what
40:25
will happen automatically you know you
40:28
leave the building and you find yourself
40:32
on the street and it isn’t an
40:35
instruction to do anything it’s a
40:37
description that in each moment we will
40:39
function exactly according to our design
40:42
and the circumstance we find ourself in
40:45
so given our design which is made up of
40:48
essentially our genes and
40:50
up-to-date-conditioning that’s what the
40:53
human being is in each moment a result
40:56
of genes and up-to-date-conditioning you
40:58
find yourself on the street and the body
41:00
understands that it has to be careful of
41:02
cars but when the light is green you can
41:05
cross when the light is red you have to
41:07
wait
41:08
that’s all automatic it’s not our doing
41:11
it’s a functioning that we have been
41:14
designed to a functioning that will
41:18
happen based on our design in the
41:20
circumstance and so when the thinking
41:24
mind kicks up because a car goes through
41:27
the red light let’s say and almost hits
41:31
you and the thinking mind kicks in where
41:35
there is blame for what that person has
41:37
done the working mind automatically can
41:42
kick in and say actually your happiness
41:45
is always attitudinal not circumstantial
41:47
meaning your happiness is not because of
41:50
circumstance
41:51
but because of your attitude to
41:53
circumstance and the blame is a certain
41:58
attitude to circumstance that isn’t an
42:00
attitude of happiness it’s an attitude
42:03
of suffering and so when that comes up
42:07
the working mind might see it and what
42:09
could happen is a stopping of blame on
42:15
what basis are an understanding that yes
42:17
these things happen as part of life
42:20
that I can understand it’s happened to
42:25
me where the person was not paying
42:28
attention and missed the red light or
42:31
was in a big rush and decided that it
42:33
was worth going through the red light
42:35
given their circumstance it doesn’t mean
42:37
it’s favorable the car could have hit
42:39
you and broken your leg could hit
42:41
someone you love and kill them so the
42:45
circumstance is going to remain either
42:47
pleasure or pain and sometimes quite
42:50
intense pleasure intense pleasure or
42:54
intense pain the attitude towards the
42:59
circumstance doesn’t change the
43:01
circumstance that’s why if we start to
43:09
see these things more clearly see the
43:11
distinction between circumstance and our
43:13
attitude that’s one of the biggest
43:16
distinctions that we need to start to
43:19
recognize that there is a difference
43:21
between the circumstance which is always
43:23
pleasure and pain and our attitude to
43:26
the circumstance then when the attitude
43:30
is of blame the working mind can kick in
43:33
and say this isn’t helping me this is
43:36
just adding a load of suffering on top
43:37
of the painful situation now remembering
43:42
this is not an instruction this is what
43:45
you should do if there is suffering you
43:49
should cut it off that’s not what I’m
43:51
saying because the fact is that if our
43:53
makeup is such that the doer ship and
43:56
attachment to outcome is a certain has a
43:58
certain intensity there’s no way that
44:00
the blame can’t be there in that
44:03
situation the situation was part of
44:07
destiny the person going through the red
44:09
light and our attitude is also part of
44:12
destiny and if life is put in certain
44:18
the Leafs of doer ship and attachment to
44:20
outcome blame has to be there so the
44:25
next layer of freedom is for us to
44:27
recognize that the blame is also a
44:29
happening not our doing and to not
44:35
resist the blame because if we leave
44:39
here thinking oh my job is to not blame
44:42
and to not feel guilt and then someone
44:46
goes through the red light and then we
44:48
blame them there’s the first layer of
44:50
suffering on top of the pain and then we
44:52
say oh I shouldn’t blame so we try to
44:54
stop blaming the blame doesn’t stop and
44:56
then we start feeling shame for not
44:59
being able to stop the blame then now
45:02
we’ve got two layers of suffering on top
45:03
of the circumstance the doer that is
45:11
attached to outcomes here’s the
45:12
potential that suffering can come to an
45:15
end and then insists on it and says or
45:18
in this case I don’t want suffering to
45:20
arise ever again after this point I know
45:21
that the potential is the end of
45:23
suffering and so that’s it no more
45:25
suffering inevitably in the next moment
45:28
something goes wrong and suffering
45:30
arises if that’s the attitude that’s
45:33
been put in place that’s more attachment
45:35
to outcome right that’s more expectation
45:37
of how life should look the expectation
45:40
that life now should have no suffering
45:42
expectation is part of the false idea of
45:46
who we are in life because it’s it’s not
45:50
understanding that the whole story of
45:52
life including our attitude is sort of
45:54
it’s here it’s in the can remesh would
45:57
say life has been written directed
45:59
produced and it’s in the can and we get
46:02
to see what has been put in the can
46:06
moment after moment after moment what
46:11
we’re seeing in cluding our feelings
46:13
about what’s happening is the story of
46:17
life so to the extent that they can be
46:20
this complete attitude of nandu oh sure
46:23
if there’s a complete attitude of nando
46:26
ship then the guilt and the blame isn’t
46:27
going to arise but that can be gradual
46:31
so while it’s while this process of
46:36
dissolution is gradually happening
46:38
at some point the non-involvement in the
46:42
suffering kicks in we say what to do I’m
46:47
in complete resistance with this
46:49
situation that’s there and hopefully
46:54
something inside of us recognizes the
46:56
complete resistance to the situation and
46:59
allows that to be there if that happens
47:02
on that outer level of nandu a ship of
47:06
seeing everything as a happening on that
47:09
outer level there’s peace and that
47:14
attitude of the non doer ship on the
47:17
outer level is what works its way in and
47:20
eventually dissolves the basis on which
47:23
the guilt and the blame arise so I’ll
47:31
talk for just a few more minutes and
47:33
then I’m sure well you’re very welcome
47:35
to ask questions why are we not the
47:40
doers on what basis can we see that
47:44
we’re not the doers now we can be given
47:48
as a sort of a statement
47:52
everything’s are happening according to
47:53
God’s will and so if that’s the case if
47:57
that’s true then we could rationalize
47:59
I’m not the doer because everything that
48:02
is happening including these words and
48:04
the way the thoughts in your head when
48:06
you’re hearing them the actions that I
48:08
perform and the actions that everyone
48:11
performs you know the the whole story of
48:15
evolution the dinosaurs that this or the
48:17
extinction of the dinosaurs if that
48:19
actually happened
48:21
political power power struggles and all
48:26
sorts of things the whole kit and
48:29
caboodle is all God’s will and so I’m
48:33
not the doer
48:34
now that’s essentially the concept
48:38
that’s being put forward but believing
48:42
in God’s will could be like believing in
48:43
Santa Claus right I don’t suggest that
48:48
we just believe in God’s will because
48:50
we’ve been told that that’s act
48:52
really what tends to happen in religions
48:55
that’s saying sometimes not not
48:57
necessarily in religions but how humans
49:01
tend to relate to concepts that are put
49:05
forward without a degree of critical
49:08
thinking without a degree of
49:10
investigating for oneself
49:12
and then those beliefs are not going to
49:16
deliver us from freedom oh not going to
49:18
deliver us to freedom from suffering so
49:22
I would like someone to say you know
49:25
what do you mean I’m not the doer and I
49:28
hope there’s a better answer than just
49:30
everything’s God’s will now the
49:33
statement that everything is God’s will
49:34
to me is accurate but we have to come to
49:38
see why it’s accurate essentially it’s a
49:41
really simple complex concept why the
49:45
human being is not the doer and it
49:49
doesn’t take a lot of intellectual
49:51
capacity we don’t need to be rocket
49:53
scientists or genetic scientists to
49:57
understand this it’s essentially saying
50:00
that at some point a sperm and egg came
50:02
together and formed an organism that
50:08
because of the intelligence innately
50:13
part of that organism starts to grow so
50:16
it’s not a personal intelligence it’s a
50:19
biological intelligence and so it it
50:23
should be very clear for us that we
50:25
didn’t do the growing of the organism
50:26
just like a plant doesn’t really do its
50:30
own growing it just follows the laws of
50:33
life it doesn’t even follow it it is the
50:37
unfolding of the laws of life and so the
50:41
sperm here come together and the
50:42
organism grows to two arms form two legs
50:46
form the heart forms the brain forms at
50:48
a certain point it’s grown enough that
50:50
the heart starts pumping its mechanics
50:53
essentially biological mechanics and
50:56
whether whether to arms form or only one
51:00
arm forms is a result of the specific
51:03
genetic structure
51:05
of that organism and then at a certain
51:10
point out comes the baby and it’s
51:13
exposed to so we could say that there is
51:17
the hardware the genetic structure and
51:19
then that genetic structure is never
51:23
insulated from life it’s always part of
51:27
life and being impacted by what’s
51:30
happening in the environment so even
51:33
when the organism was in the mother’s
51:35
womb it was being impacted by that
51:39
environment so if there was a shortage
51:43
of a certain vitamin or mineral or
51:46
whatever then the organism would be
51:48
affected by that shortage it would be
51:50
conditioned essentially according to a
51:53
shortage of a certain mineral and
51:55
vitamin and when those minerals and
51:58
vitamins in there its conditioned by the
52:01
fact that they’re there and so what form
52:06
it takes in each moment as a result of
52:08
the genetic growth the genetic blueprint
52:12
and how it is conditioned by the new
52:16
conditioning moment after moment after
52:18
moment after moment and so then the baby
52:21
is born and life continues to condition
52:23
at moment after moment after moment so
52:26
the concept being put forward is the
52:28
human being in each moment if we could
52:31
take a sort of photo snapshot of the
52:34
human being but not just physical but of
52:36
the genes and up-to-date-conditioning
52:37
the human being would be one way in each
52:40
moment it’s a very complex organism
52:43
that’s always in complete flux but in
52:46
each moment snap use free freeze-frame
52:48
it in a moment and it’s one way and the
52:51
next moment it’s changing because the
52:52
organism continues to grow and life
52:55
continues to deliver new conditioning
52:57
and so the concept is saying in each
53:00
moment we are one way according to our
53:03
genes and up-to-date-conditioning those
53:05
are the two factors that determine the
53:07
human’s biological and psychological
53:08
makeup and we are therefore forced to
53:13
function according to the very complex
53:16
situation we find ourselves in
53:18
and our particular makeup in that moment
53:23
so when the intellect kicks in and this
53:28
is the intellect of the thinking mind
53:32
that isn’t really very well informed and
53:34
it looks at something that happens and
53:36
says oh I should have acted differently
53:39
that’s a thought process of the
53:42
intellect that doesn’t understand the
53:48
actual dynamic by which we acted we
53:53
acted based on a very specific makeup in
53:56
that moment and the very specific
53:59
circumstance we found ourself in so we
54:02
couldn’t have acted differently we had
54:04
to produce the output we produce based
54:06
on our design and the circumstance if
54:09
the outcome was different if the output
54:12
was different it would mean that either
54:15
the circumstance was different or our
54:17
particular makeup was different is that
54:22
clear yeah now it’s clear that we don’t
54:30
relate to ourself this way we don’t
54:34
relate to the other this way but why
54:38
simply because we haven’t been
54:41
conditioned with new information that
54:44
allows us to contemplate and come to
54:49
understand that yes we’re a very complex
54:53
organism so we don’t need to understand
54:54
the complexity we just need to
54:55
understand that we’re very complex but
54:58
we didn’t create the complexity and in
54:59
each moment there is a certain
55:01
complexity that means we’re going to
55:04
function a certain way so very much like
55:06
a toaster is designed to produce toast
55:10
and we don’t ask the toaster to make us
55:13
a cup of tea it just doesn’t make sense
55:16
to us to expect the toaster to make a
55:18
cup of tea and yet we look at ourselves
55:20
and we say oh I should have acted
55:23
differently in that situation you should
55:25
have acted differently in that situation
55:27
which is essentially asking the toaster
55:30
to make tea
55:42
it’s neuroticism right really we’re
55:46
neurotic and life has made us neurotic
55:49
and then life potentially because of new
55:55
conditioning corrects the error so we
55:58
shouldn’t feel shame for being neurotic
56:00
we could laugh at it actually so I
56:03
suspect that humanity if it lasts two or
56:05
three hundred years will laugh at the
56:07
fact that the its ancestors actually
56:12
believed that they were the doers
56:15
believed in separation because at a
56:17
certain point once this starts to become
56:21
seen by enough people in the world a
56:28
change starts to happen and as we know
56:36
once it reaches a critical mass the
56:38
change becomes complete and then any new
56:45
humans are born into an environment that
56:48
no longer supports the error so I would
56:51
imagine that at some point humanity
56:54
simply based on the fact that um
56:58
suffering is based on an error and life
57:01
can correct the error so I would suspect
57:05
that at some point freedom from
57:08
suffering will be the norm everyone will
57:13
have evolved to live not only to survive
57:18
in life but to survive happily so so far
57:21
evolution has got us to a point where we
57:24
can survive in life much more easily as
57:26
a standard as a default
57:28
you know there’s running water and jobs
57:31
and financial systems so most well it’s
57:35
not necessarily most people there’s
57:36
still a lot of people below the poverty
57:37
line but there’s a large proportion of
57:41
people who aren’t below the public
57:43
poverty line and don’t need to be too
57:45
concerned about whether they’re going to
57:48
survive the next day or not so that
57:51
wasn’t the case 10,000 years ago 10,000
57:54
years ago I think
57:55
probably had to work a lot harder to
57:57
survive than we do now so evolution has
57:59
got us to a point where we can survive
58:01
and we started seeing lights going off
58:06
in the in the in the collective well
58:12
what do we want in the collective let’s
58:14
just call it that so Buddha telling us
58:16
about freedom from suffering Lao Tzu
58:19
telling us from freedom of freedom from
58:21
suffering all of the Mystics are sort of
58:25
lights going off in the human evolution
58:28
which is the beginning of the wave of
58:32
now not only surviving but surviving
58:34
happily and the so that’s why we’re not
58:41
the doers
58:42
because essentially we’re functioning
58:45
according to our genes and
58:46
up-to-date-conditioning to factors that
58:48
we have never been in control of so you
58:50
weren’t in control of the family you
58:51
were born to the geographical location
58:53
you were born to the school you went to
58:55
the friends you made the political and
58:58
the religious influences in your life
59:00
all of that is conditioning that comes
59:03
in as new conditioning in each moment
59:06
and the new conditioning that comes in
59:08
adds to the up-to-date conditioning
59:11
which is the cumulative effect of all
59:13
the conditioning up to that point
59:15
so our up-to-date conditioning is
59:18
continually changing by new conditioning
59:21
coming in but it’s not new conditioning
59:24
that we’re in control of so coming to
59:26
the talk we might say well I’m in
59:29
control of this new conditioning but you
59:31
had no idea really what was going to
59:34
come out of my mouth frankly nor did i I
59:37
just know that I function in each moment
59:40
according to my genes and
59:41
up-to-date-conditioning so whatever is
59:43
coming out of my mouth is a direct
59:46
consequence of Who I am in each moment a
59:50
factor or two based on two factors that
59:54
I’ve never had any control over so even
59:57
a decision to go to university or not go
59:59
to university which we say well I
60:01
decided to put myself in that situation
60:03
which means I’m going to get conditioned
60:05
more or less a particular way even that
60:08
decision
60:09
is a decision based on your genes and
60:11
up-to-date-conditioning to factors you
60:14
had no control over so we have to say
60:16
well even this condition these each
60:18
choice that we make in life it is a
60:20
choice
60:21
but it’s not my choice in the sense that
60:25
we imagine ourself as a you know
60:28
separate independent entity that could
60:30
choose anything we can only choose what
60:33
we’re designed to choose so that’s why
60:40
we’re not the doers and that’s why um
60:42
life is essentially happening according
60:44
to God’s will or life’s will because
60:47
life put these factors in place the way
60:50
they are and so therefore we function
60:51
that way and this the other part of our
60:54
suffering is the belief in attachment to
60:57
outcome meaning the belief that says my
61:00
happiness my completeness is to be found
61:03
by life being pleasure pleasure pleasure
61:05
pleasure so how can we confirm that it’s
61:12
not that my happiness isn’t to be found
61:15
in pleasure pleasure pleasure play the
61:17
first way we can confirm it so this
61:20
means not just believing right that our
61:25
happiness isn’t to be found in outcomes
61:27
but rather seeing it in such a way that
61:31
we can confirm it so we’ve all lived
61:34
enough years to know that we’ve received
61:36
pleasure maybe not all the pleasure
61:39
we’ve wanted but we’ve received more
61:41
than enough pleasure in life to know
61:43
that it doesn’t give me continuous
61:45
unbroken peace of mind or that it forget
61:48
continuous unbroken pismo that it
61:50
doesn’t give me continuous unbroken
61:51
happiness you get pleasure and it’s
61:55
pleasurable so this is not a denial of
61:58
pleasure and pain it’s not saying to
62:00
push pleasure away and embrace pain we
62:06
still get to enjoy pleasure when it’s
62:08
there but we get to relate to pleasure
62:10
in a healthy way which means yes it’s
62:12
going to be pleasurable but let me not
62:14
put let me not invest in this outcome
62:19
something that it can’t deliver so let
62:22
me not go
62:23
to the future expecting pleasure to
62:25
deliver something in can’t deliver I’m
62:27
going to expect pleasure to deliver
62:29
pleasure not continuous unbroken
62:31
happiness and so we’ve had our own
62:35
experience enough pleasure in life to
62:38
draw the conclusion god knows only why
62:41
we don’t draw this conclusion given that
62:43
the evidence is so evident to us the
62:47
explanation is because of this divine
62:50
hypnosis that’s been put in place that
62:52
prevents us from constructively seeing
62:57
what’s right in front of us and drawing
62:59
the correct conclusions about it until
63:02
such time as that divine hypnosis
63:05
weakens enough so that’s what one of the
63:10
proofs that we have is we’ve received
63:12
pleasure and it hasn’t given us
63:14
continuous happen the other is that as
63:17
our attitude starts to change as we
63:19
start to focus on peace of mind rather
63:21
than outcomes as we understand that life
63:24
is going to deliver pain from time to
63:26
time and pain is delivered and the
63:30
thinking mind kicks in the thinking mind
63:32
is the guilt or the blame or the
63:36
attachment to outcome which is resisting
63:39
the pain in a way that creates suffering
63:44
um we find ourselves in that situation
63:48
we find the suffering arising and then
63:51
the think the working mind kicks in and
63:53
cuts off the thinking mind and if that
63:56
happens what we might experience well if
63:59
it happens what we will experience is
64:01
life filled with resistance to the pain
64:06
in the moment and then the falling away
64:10
of that resistance the circumstance is
64:12
still going to be painful the
64:14
circumstance is still that we’ve let’s
64:16
say missed our aeroplane or that a
64:18
business partner has cheated us or that
64:21
someone that we love has died and we
64:25
drop into what we could call the heart
64:28
which is dropping out of the thinking
64:31
mind that is in resistance to this and
64:33
we remember
64:35
like not it’s not a remember as a
64:37
thought but we drop into a place where
64:39
we feel ah yes Here I am
64:42
like I got lost for a second I forgot
64:45
what I am at my core a core that we’ve
64:50
been disconnected from for most of our
64:53
life because we’ve been seeking
64:54
outwardly but now what I’m suggesting is
64:57
as the tide is changing we become more
65:00
connected to this place inside more
65:03
often we can drop there and find this
65:06
smile of remembrance come to our faith
65:08
and that remembrance is where we realize
65:12
on what I am at my core doesn’t require
65:15
life to be pleasure pleasure pleasure
65:16
pleasure
65:18
and we find ourselves a peace even in
65:22
the face of pain and then we start
65:25
having our own first-hand experience our
65:29
own first-hand proof that my peace of
65:33
mind which is attitudinal to
65:35
circumstance is available even in the
65:38
face of pain and as this grows we find
65:42
that we can remain centered in this
65:45
ground of being at peace as life
65:49
continues to unfold sometimes pleasure
65:52
and sometimes pain and then that’s our
65:55
proof that my happiness isn’t to be
65:58
found and outcomes
66:06
so if you put your hand on your heart at
66:13
a certain point during the day and say
66:15
at this point at this moment I can say
66:17
I’m not happy not because of someone
66:22
telling you you’re not happy but you
66:23
just feel it you know either I’m not
66:26
happy and you investigate my suggestion
66:31
is that you’ll always find one of these
66:35
forms of suffering guilt blame pride
66:39
worrying or expectation and you’ll
66:44
notice that these forms of suffering are
66:46
not the circumstance itself but an
66:49
attitude to the circumstance so you
66:51
might be waiting for test results from
66:54
the doctor that’s the circumstance the
66:58
attitude might be what’s going I wonder
67:01
what the results are going to be what if
67:03
they’re not positive what if they’re not
67:06
positive how am I going to plan for the
67:10
future for my family and all of that
67:12
that’s the anxiety or could be the
67:15
anxiety and it’s not because of the
67:19
circumstance the circumstance is at the
67:23
moment the results haven’t come back so
67:26
you don’t know and even if the results
67:28
come back and it’s a bad result then the
67:35
circumstance is that you have a bad
67:37
result the attitude is something very
67:42
different so that’s something that we
67:44
need to discern by seeing it in action
67:47
and then we start to see the difference
67:49
between the attitude and the
67:51
circumstance itself so the suggestion is
67:54
if you can put your hand on your heart
67:55
and say in this moment I’m not happy and
67:57
not a happiness of feeling excited but a
68:03
happiness of simply being at peace
68:06
you’ll find that it’s suffering always
68:09
that is your unhappiness and then it
68:12
becomes more and more clear that
68:13
actually my happiness is simply the
68:15
falling away of suffering
68:18
and the suffering guilt blame and pride
68:20
based on the belief in personal doer
68:22
ship if the belief in personal doer ship
68:25
falls away you simply can’t have the
68:27
attitude of guilt and blame anymore and
68:32
anxiety and worry expectation and
68:35
attachment to outcomes all based on the
68:37
belief my happiness my completeness is
68:39
to be found in life being pleasure
68:41
pleasure pleasure
68:42
so hence that’s why all this talk on
68:46
these two essentially deeply ingrained
68:51
beliefs in order because they’re
68:54
directly related to what we’re really
68:55
looking for which is peace of mind which
68:57
is just the end of suffering
69:17
so if anyone has any questions or
69:19
comments you’re welcome to ask there’s a
69:22
microphone there there’s a button
69:24
halfway down that you need to press and
69:26
the green light comes on Roger first of
69:32
all thank you so much for living these
69:33
talks I think they’re immensely helpful
69:35
in understanding the concepts you have
69:37
put forward like life so far everything
69:41
like you know I’ve had a lot of
69:42
suffering like lives been pretty fair
69:45
but it doesn’t mean that you know I’ve
69:48
grown up like with a lot of abundance of
69:49
resources something like but there’s
69:51
always a feeling of contentment and and
69:53
hearing these concepts I could play to
69:55
this as to like how these things work
69:58
and I would say there is a fairly
70:02
continuous flow of peace of mind but I
70:07
still feel like there is a there’s a
70:09
part of me learn if I can call that me
70:11
but there is a part of in there which
70:13
kind of seeks and something and I don’t
70:17
either I’m seeking for that oneness
70:20
experience that you always say that
70:22
don’t go for it like you know if it if
70:23
it has to come it will come or like you
70:26
know understanding how this whole life
70:28
works like how does life and death work
70:30
how do senses works is there’s a lot of
70:33
like things you know it feels like I
70:35
don’t know about and I’m not sure like
70:38
where I’m trying to seek those things or
70:40
I’m trying to take peace of mind but
70:42
which I feel like I do have it but there
70:45
is there some seeking that I feel is
70:48
happening so the seeking that is still
70:52
happening is the part of you that isn’t
70:56
at peace in a sense because so if when
71:00
the peace of mind is complete then
71:03
there’s nothing more to seek so what
71:06
you’re saying makes complete sense that
71:07
you have a large degree of peace of mind
71:11
or maybe you’d say complete peace of
71:13
mind which it isn’t because you say and
71:16
then but there is still a part of me
71:18
that suffers right but that’s not my
71:20
point the point isn’t that we shouldn’t
71:22
be saying oh it’s not about comparing
71:24
ourselves or anything but it’s about
71:26
recognizing that the CT
71:29
for something is suffering hmm
71:33
it is suffering so now we really need to
71:35
ask is that seeking what I’m really
71:40
looking for or do I have a false idea of
71:45
what I’m really looking for like an idea
71:48
that society has told me about or that
71:50
spiritual teachings have told me about
71:51
or things that I feel are important but
71:57
on investigation I might find that
71:59
they’re not and could it be that I have
72:01
this idea of what extra I need to find
72:06
that is causing the suffering because
72:08
that is the suffering the seeking for
72:10
and if in an instant you say actually I
72:14
couldn’t care less about those things
72:17
because if even if I find out about them
72:21
what will they give me and the answer is
72:25
at best pleasure that that’s my answer
72:28
when you look at these things at best
72:30
pleasure but what’s more important is
72:33
you realize that the problem is that if
72:35
I keep seeking those answers thinking
72:38
that without them something fundamental
72:41
is missing that is what disturbs my
72:45
peace of mind from being total so I
72:49
believe that you have a large degree of
72:53
peace of mind in fact I can very much
72:55
relate to what you say from my own very
72:59
personal experiences there was a lot of
73:00
peace of mind but I didn’t necessarily
73:04
fully appreciate that it was there and
73:08
that actually that’s what the spiritual
73:10
sea search was all about which is why at
73:13
the beginning of the talks I guess I
73:16
framed it in a sense that said after all
73:19
of the realizations and insights what
73:21
have we actually left with in practical
73:23
terms and the answer that I put forward
73:25
was all of that seeking and
73:28
understanding is really there just to
73:30
leave us in a position where peace of
73:34
mind is there so I had a lot of peace of
73:39
mind but I was convinced
73:42
part of me was convinced that this
73:45
spiritual search is about much more than
73:47
that the spiritual search is about
73:49
seeing reality that’s what um the
73:54
process that I was on the path I was on
73:57
included a lot of pointers that were
73:59
very helpful at bringing about change
74:01
but I sort of held them a little bit too
74:04
literally or related to them I didn’t
74:07
see the full reason of why certain
74:09
things were being said and so I was
74:12
convinced that enlightenment is about
74:14
some very radical seeing of truth that I
74:21
currently don’t have and I didn’t feel
74:26
like I had this truth that books you
74:31
know volumes and volumes are written
74:33
about and so there was a seeking for
74:38
this truth that I didn’t feel I had
74:40
because my expectation was this truth
74:43
and at the beginning of the search I had
74:47
read something which was very useful at
74:49
that time and said you don’t know
74:50
yourself fully that’s the error when you
74:59
come to know yourself you’ll see that
75:01
you are brighter than the light of a
75:03
billion suns and when I read that I
75:06
thought wow this is the search this is
75:08
what I’m going to dedicate my life to so
75:11
that’s why I was written there right
75:12
that’s why it said that because at a
75:15
certain point it’s sort of named it’s
75:18
sort of like spiritual marketing to get
75:21
you hooked in a process that will give
75:26
you what you need but sometimes it needs
75:29
to give sort of suggests that it’s going
75:32
to give you much more so that you remain
75:34
interested so there’s all these things
75:37
along the way that get put in place and
75:41
sometimes we we don’t relate to them so
75:44
healthily and so I was convinced that
75:47
enlightenment is some about some
75:49
fundamental truth and that when that’s
75:53
understood
75:55
then the experience is going to be
75:57
radically different essentially who
76:02
knows what but not not just ordinary
76:05
because now I have the the truth of the
76:08
universe when we look at it we can see
76:11
that this truth and ignorance can refer
76:14
to something very small like I’m not the
76:16
doer where the error is I believe I’m
76:21
the doer the truth of the matter is
76:22
you’re not the doer and so the process
76:25
had done that it had dissolved the doer
76:27
ship belief by and large and so there
76:32
was peace and so essentially I had the
76:38
truth but I was I also had an
76:43
expectation that the truth was much more
76:45
than that so I wasn’t relating to that
76:48
as the truth let’s say and it was only
76:53
when a form of that expectation which
76:57
was the expectation that this
77:01
understanding delivers let’s say oneness
77:04
the end of separation because we’re told
77:06
it’s the end of separation and we’re
77:09
also told that it’s experiential it’s
77:12
not intellectual and then on top of that
77:16
there are oneness experiences that can
77:19
happen like and and they’re very
77:23
profound they feel very profound and so
77:26
then the intellect says this is it this
77:28
is what it’s about this oneness
77:30
experience and is it really about that
77:34
is the end of separation really talking
77:37
about an experiential shift where the
77:41
sense of being a person isn’t there
77:43
anymore
77:44
um it’s you know people will be watching
77:47
and saying yes exactly that’s exactly
77:49
what it’s about and if you say anything
77:50
even you just haven’t understood and I’m
77:55
open to someone thinking that it’s that
77:58
in the end becomes their suffering
78:00
because um I know from personal
78:04
experience I was the one on the other
78:06
side speaking with Ramesh
78:08
he was essentially saying what now I’m
78:11
sharing that really that what we’re
78:13
really looking for is something very
78:15
simple and ordinary and the realizations
78:20
can happen in a way that maybe don’t
78:23
deliver such a big impact in a
78:26
particular moment and we can overlook
78:28
them and then if we’re still seeking
78:30
oneness or non separation in an
78:32
experiential form which is something
78:36
that is not actually available on a
78:38
continuous basis in life and it’s not
78:42
important that it’s not available
78:44
because um what is available is the
78:46
peace of mind from the end of a
78:48
psychological separation a separation
78:51
that is separating myself from life
78:54
separating the other from life and
78:55
therefore making me and the other
78:57
enemies and competitors and rivals and
79:00
making me seek for something that I
79:05
believe is outside in the future that
79:08
will deliver some imaginary happiness so
79:14
to the extent that so this is all of
79:17
that talk is really just as a suggestion
79:19
to you to say to inquire for yourself
79:22
all of these things that I think are
79:24
really important could they just be some
79:29
of the remaining expectation that’s been
79:32
put in place and hasn’t really been
79:35
questioned because if I questioned it I
79:37
might find that what would I do with
79:41
this extra information about whatever
79:45
we’re looking for and I can tell you
79:48
from my experience that as soon as I
79:50
dropped that expectation and realize
79:53
that really all the search is about is
79:55
peace of mind and I have it except for
79:57
the disturbance to the peace of mind
80:02
because I expect something more in the
80:05
future to come when that fell away it
80:08
was a complete deepening of the piece
80:12
because that expectation which is of one
80:16
of the forms of suffering no longer had
80:18
a ground to arise on
80:23
and I can agree with that too in terms
80:25
of that you know if I have questioned
80:27
that before to myself like like how much
80:30
of importance to these things really
80:31
have to to me and I don’t find an answer
80:34
as to like it’s definitely important but
80:36
it’s just when I come across all these
80:38
spiritual discourses and then they’re
80:40
saying like you know about so many big
80:42
experiences and and then kind of like it
80:44
you look back and say Oh am i lacking
80:46
something like it’s it’s only when you
80:48
look at others and yeah it kind of like
80:51
gives you some kind out about yourself
80:53
that is that it or this is so much more
80:57
to still look forward to that I think
80:58
it’s yeah yeah so the solution for that
81:03
one it’s important for you to see that
81:05
as soon as comparison comes in that you
81:10
start doubting if there’s no comparison
81:13
then there’s no real space for doubt so
81:15
already that’s a hint that says I’m
81:20
getting caught up so if they’re
81:22
suffering if if you’re not comparing and
81:27
they’re suffering there then the
81:30
suffering that’s there has its own
81:32
problem that needs to be undone but if
81:36
there’s no suffering there and then the
81:38
suffering comes only when you here start
81:40
reading about these other things that
81:43
apparently you don’t have then you can
81:46
start to see that the suffering is
81:48
directly related to a wanting something
81:53
and thinking you don’t have something
81:55
rather than an innate problem that’s
81:57
there before that happens
81:59
so I I remember reading osho’s book of
82:04
secrets which is a thick book and it’s
82:08
got a lot of practices in there and that
82:12
I had received this when I had done a
82:15
course and I’d never read it and it
82:20
seems like a very impressive book and at
82:24
some point I was going on holiday and I
82:26
thought I’ll take this and I’ll read it
82:28
while I’m on holiday and this was after
82:30
my experience of suffering in life had
82:34
come to an end
82:35
and I remember was on page 109 that I
82:40
started to feel something strange
82:42
something that I hadn’t um felt for a
82:46
long time and when I looked at it I
82:50
realized that having read a hundred and
82:52
nine pages of essentially practices to
82:57
realize something that’s what their
83:00
awareness practices and things like that
83:03
as a doubt or even a seeking for
83:08
something a seeking for something that
83:09
um each practice said this is what you
83:12
need to see out of this practice and
83:16
instance I closed the book and I
83:19
realized of course this isn’t for me
83:21
that the book isn’t for me it that’s
83:23
relevant when the suffering is still
83:27
there all those practices are very
83:29
relevant things to show you things that
83:31
haven’t been seen in order to to undo
83:35
the suffering but if that’s been undone
83:39
and then we become convinced that we’re
83:41
missing something
83:42
which happens sort of accidentally
83:44
because I was innocently going through
83:46
these things and inadvertently a slight
83:50
thought that who I’m trying to get
83:52
somewhere and as soon as the suffering
83:55
when I realized what it was closed the
83:56
book and everything was fine again so
84:03
it’s it’s very important to see the
84:06
nature of the suffering and if it is
84:09
because of comparison is if it is
84:11
because of some idea or am I missing
84:14
anything then understand that is
84:19
expectation that’s a form of suffering
84:20
and as the peace is appreciated and you
84:26
really ground into it and realize this
84:28
is really all I’m looking for because it
84:30
is a such an amazing gift to find
84:33
yourself at peace regardless of
84:36
unfortunate circumstance arising um so
84:40
once that’s grounded in then people
84:44
could tell me anything
84:45
about what
84:48
enlightenment really is and it it might
84:51
be it’s just a different enlightenment
84:53
to what we’re talking about in this
84:54
teachings in this teaching it says
84:56
enlightenment is simply the end of
84:57
suffering now if someone says but you
84:59
know that’s such a shame
85:01
if you stop there what you’re missing
85:03
out on is this other enlightenment and
85:05
I’d say well I couldn’t care less about
85:07
that other enlightenment because what
85:11
when when we’re grounded in peace of
85:13
mind my experience is there’s nothing
85:16
more than that that I would want any
85:18
pleasure or pain that is going to come
85:21
in life will come and I’ll get to enjoy
85:23
it or endure the pain that doesn’t
85:27
require me to go seeking for it um so if
85:31
someone asks would you give up your
85:33
peace of mind for anything they could
85:36
put anything on the tables in no way not
85:39
not a chance like they’ll say think
85:41
about it I don’t need to think about it
85:49
so when that’s the case when which
85:54
simply means to really start to
85:57
appreciate it for what it is because we
85:59
can sometimes miss what we have thinking
86:04
that we’re looking for something more
86:05
and start to really appreciated then the
86:10
doubt falls away it’s like there’s no
86:13
doubt whether this is what I’m really
86:15
looking for and the flip flopping
86:18
process that a lot of people are
86:21
familiar with on the spiritual path
86:23
where you have a week of where life is
86:29
just easy in the sense rather it’s not
86:33
easy it’s just simple so things don’t
86:35
necessarily work out and the attitude is
86:38
well you know that’s okay the resistance
86:41
just doesn’t arise and then the flop we
86:45
wake up one morning and that ease with
86:49
life isn’t there the smallest of things
86:52
creates a uncomfortableness and a
86:54
resistance that to me is one of the
86:57
great
86:59
occlusions in this process that allows
87:01
us from our own experience in that
87:03
moment especially just as its transition
87:08
for us to realize all I’m really looking
87:10
for is the end of the flop um and we can
87:15
go through this flip-flopping for a long
87:17
time and still think that we’re looking
87:18
for um
87:20
pleasure because the flop is really
87:23
telling us what you need is for the
87:25
circumstance to change and all of that
87:27
but at some point this insight kicks in
87:29
and we can explain
87:30
we exclaim to ourselves actually all I’m
87:33
really looking for is the end of this
87:35
uncomfortableness the end of the flop
87:37
peace of mind okay can I ask one more
87:43
question so you talk about like falling
87:46
into the heart right so it’s sort of
87:49
like I understand it a little bit more
87:50
because I feel like it’s just being
87:52
aware of this you know the circumstances
87:54
around you and kinda like feeling
87:57
somehow like gravity like it’s like it’s
87:58
there is awareness of these things is
88:00
that it or is there something more to it
88:02
like a it’s um the so falling into the
88:08
heart it’s a good question someone asked
88:09
me this recently hopefully they’re
88:11
watching and I get to answer it and the
88:13
same thing because there is a sense of
88:15
being awareness or at least being aware
88:18
of everything that’s happening and
88:22
usually when we become and and even that
88:25
just for those people that are listening
88:27
and then think oh I haven’t had that so
88:30
I must be missing this awareness aspect
88:34
even that tends to dissolve and become
88:40
much more normal so this sense of being
88:43
aware even that can fall away and it’s
88:46
not a problem if there falls away as
88:47
long as what remains is the internal non
88:51
involvement which really means and we
88:54
only know that that’s there when pain
88:57
comes in the course of life and we find
89:00
that there isn’t a resistance happening
89:02
so if that’s happening on that’s the
89:04
deepest form of witnessing often when
89:08
the awareness
89:11
sort of space where we serve know
89:13
ourself as formless awareness um that’s
89:18
what we relate to as witnessing because
89:19
it really feels like I’m just witnessing
89:21
everything arise in that field of
89:23
awareness that I am and if the
89:29
suggestion that that fades away or when
89:31
it fades away we think Oh where’s it
89:34
gone something’s gone wrong but what
89:36
that what it could be is a deepening of
89:39
that witnessing such that it’s not even
89:42
felt as a qualitative witnessing anymore
89:45
and instead of anything having anything
89:51
missing it’s just gone into a deeper
89:52
phase and we know it’s still happening
89:56
we know the witnessing is still
89:58
happening because the involvement in the
89:59
pleasure and pain doesn’t arise um
90:03
that’s just for those people who maybe
90:07
have peace already but without these
90:09
different states so to give them
90:12
something that says it’s not actually
90:15
about a state it’s about the peace of
90:18
mind and the states can happen and they
90:21
can help bring about a seeing of life
90:26
such that the doer ship and attachment
90:28
falls away but if we can if the doer
90:32
ship and attachment can fall away even
90:34
without both states presenting it the
90:38
states the shifts are just one way that
90:41
it can get dissolved so there are two
90:46
two aspects that tend to present one is
90:48
the knowing oneself is formless
90:51
awareness that’s I guess you could say
90:54
one aspect of consciousness the formless
90:58
awareness and when that state presents
91:03
itself in a way there isn’t even a sense
91:05
of being not it the beingness isn’t
91:10
really felt there is just knowing
91:12
oneself as formless non located
91:16
awareness the being has a different
91:20
quality to it and they tend they tend to
91:23
present at different times so we tend to
91:28
have one present and then another
91:31
present and if we come through the
91:34
top-down non dual teachings about
91:37
awareness you are not the body you are
91:39
formless awareness the awareness aspect
91:42
tends to present first because in a way
91:47
we’ve we’ve been looking at the body and
91:53
ever as not what I am and so then
91:57
there’s a formless formless awareness
91:59
realization the beingness actually
92:02
requires us to Rhian habit the body to
92:09
come back in and realize that the
92:13
awareness is actually the awareness that
92:15
would be that we had become familiar
92:17
with is actually functioning through the
92:19
body and so not necessarily always be in
92:27
this non locatable state of awareness
92:34
but to come back and realize even so if
92:37
I come back and sort of become more
92:40
grounded in the body and say well
92:42
actually I am the body because we’ve
92:44
been saying I’m not the body for so long
92:46
and that’s important because we
92:49
previously were obsessed with being the
92:51
body we only knew the physical and so
92:55
those teachings are saying well how do I
92:57
get you to see another aspect of
92:59
yourself that hasn’t been seen so they
93:02
do it by saying you’re not the body
93:03
you’re not your thoughts you’re not your
93:05
emotions you are that which is aware of
93:07
all of that okay so then we’ve become
93:10
aware of that aspect now we have to come
93:12
back and integrate it so that we know
93:13
our self as a person a person is the
93:18
body plus consciousness plus awareness
93:21
and that’s where we can start feeling
93:25
the sense of beingness
93:27
more
93:30
and often it seems counterintuitive
93:35
because we like before coming in contact
93:40
with this awareness aspect of ourself we
93:43
were sort of located in the body that’s
93:45
where all the problems were we tended to
93:48
take life much more personal from there
93:50
so we think well if I come back in isn’t
93:53
that sort of counterintuitive to this
93:56
process isn’t it counterproductive even
93:58
to this process but it’s not the process
94:00
is about becoming coming back to being
94:05
human but now coming back without losing
94:09
the awareness of the awareness aspect of
94:13
the human and so there’s beingness tends
94:23
to be something that will feel if we are
94:26
in in the body allow the center of
94:32
consciousness essentially to drift down
94:36
into what Ramana refers to as the
94:38
spiritual heart when it’s out there it’s
94:43
sort of it’s not that that’s a that
94:46
that’s I’m not referring to this as a
94:47
problem right it being us knowing life
94:52
from this formless awareness point of
94:54
view that it’s it’s part of the
94:56
awakening parting a part of the self
94:57
realization because the awareness aspect
94:59
is part of the self but we also need to
95:02
know the embodied self so allow the
95:05
center of consciousness to drift down
95:07
into the body again and we can still now
95:10
we can feel like I’m aware from the the
95:15
heart aware of the visual visual aspects
95:20
aware of all of life from the heart
95:22
instead of from the head and my
95:25
experience is that’s where the
95:28
being-ness comes from from inhabiting
95:33
the body and dropping into the heart
95:36
thank you very much
95:42
hey Roger this is Amit thanks so much
95:47
for taking us through very insightful
95:48
things I think two important concepts
95:52
which I can take away you know from this
95:54
session is the one is the to worship and
95:56
the other is attachment to the outcomes
95:59
you know fortunately in my life unlike
96:02
my friend I’ve had a lot of suffering
96:03
but I think the second concept which is
96:05
about not attaching yourself the outcome
96:08
is helping a lot because regardless of
96:10
whether good things are happening or bad
96:11
I have tried to detach myself from that
96:14
but that being said you know going back
96:16
to the first concept I have a different
96:20
view on that I mean I think I believe
96:25
that we need to do things to make our
96:27
lives better and when I say I I don’t
96:29
mean to say this from a very egoistic
96:31
point of view but it is more like going
96:34
back to bhagavad-gita right which
96:36
primarily focuses on you know your
96:39
actions the outcomes are not in your
96:40
hands but you still have to act I mean
96:42
which could also mean coming to this
96:44
session for example try to seek
96:46
something more you know in your life how
96:48
do you kind of relate this you know
96:50
because I know there’s that disconnect
96:52
between I mean how I may be thinking and
96:54
what you just said how do you relate it
96:56
to this concept because unless we do
96:58
things how do we expect things to become
97:00
better you know we talk about passion
97:02
commitment you know find the belly to
97:05
get things done so how do you kind of
97:07
relate this yeah so the the attitude
97:10
because Nandu ship doesn’t mean not
97:13
doing anything that’s often because of
97:16
the words Nandu ership it it can easily
97:19
be mean oh I have to stop doing and just
97:22
sit still what it refers to is our
97:25
attitude to what is happening so in life
97:29
the person is going to continue to
97:32
function so the Nandu ship is an is an
97:37
attitude of seeing what is happening as
97:41
a happening and not my doing so
97:44
acceptance doesn’t mean to accept and
97:48
not to act acceptance means in a
97:53
particular moment I accept that this is
97:55
destiny in this moment but I also accept
98:00
that it could be my my destiny to act to
98:06
try and improve the situation right
98:10
where if we think that acceptance is to
98:14
accept and not act that might be a
98:17
belief that is somehow getting in the
98:19
way of our natural functioning so what
98:23
this says is if the water pipe that
98:26
you’ve just had fixed bursts open there
98:31
needs to be a recognition that that’s
98:34
life pain is being delivered you paid a
98:37
lot of money to fix the water pipe and
98:38
now it’s burst opening in so pain and
98:43
understand my happiness is not to be
98:45
found in pleasure pleasure pleasure
98:47
pleasure and then that doesn’t mean you
98:49
sit there looking at the water pipe
98:51
zen-like thinking that acceptance means
98:54
seeing the water flow out for the rest
98:58
of your life the with the acceptance
99:01
that in this moment there is pain not
99:03
what I would like you then function
99:06
according to your makeup and do whatever
99:09
you can to improve the situation knowing
99:12
that the outcome is not in your control
99:15
what tends to happen is we do what we
99:19
can to an improve a situation but we
99:22
remain attached to the outcome and so
99:24
when the outcome doesn’t happen we are
99:27
in resistance to the fact the outcome
99:28
hasn’t happened so this is saying though
99:30
your biological intelligence is going to
99:34
try and and fix the situation and so it
99:37
should just don’t be attached to the
99:40
outcome so this means if you see a
99:43
bigger on the street acceptance is I
99:47
accept it’s their destiny but I also
99:50
accept that in the next moment it could
99:52
be my destiny to give them some money
99:54
and in the same on the same vein we see
100:00
a beggar on the street
100:02
we accept it’s their destiny and we
100:05
might see that we don’t give the money
100:07
in that instant and there’s an
100:08
acceptance of that M so the hopefully
100:13
that makes it clear that this is not
100:16
saying that you shouldn’t aim to improve
100:18
your life you will function according to
100:21
your makeup and you’ll be able to try
100:23
and improve your life as best you can
100:25
and the outcome is not in your control
100:29
so in the bhagavad-gita when our Juna
100:33
said I can’t fight my relatives and my
100:37
gurus maybe my relatives but my gurus
100:40
know and Krishna’s response to him was
100:45
you are a warrior meaning you’ve been
100:48
designed by life as a warrior you must
100:51
fight you will fight because that’s your
100:54
design yeah so you will act you will
100:58
fight and then he said but as time I
101:03
have already killed them so it means you
101:09
aren’t the doer of the fighting you are
101:14
the instruments through which me is time
101:17
meaning the story of life I’ve already
101:19
killed them right so the outcome is my
101:23
doing and not your doing so you will act
101:27
but the outcome is not in your control
101:44
a similar question on a similar line
101:51
relating to a practical day so let’s say
101:55
it’s a Monday morning after we get in
101:58
the office and there are suddenly there
102:02
are hundreds of emails you are expected
102:05
to give certain reports in short time
102:08
say in a day or so as you are
102:11
concentrating on what to do as a
102:13
priority there are phone calls giving
102:14
you new information which either you
102:17
want or you don’t want and then there
102:21
are some other people waiting for you
102:22
and they are expecting you to take some
102:24
decisions so under such situation how to
102:29
apply non doership because you are
102:32
expected to take certain decisions you
102:34
are expected to finish some work within
102:35
given time and you feel time pressure
102:39
and you feel as if you are going to step
102:42
on a treadmill which is running at a
102:44
very high speed and you just are
102:47
expected to cope up with that so what
102:50
kind of attitude which you can adopt and
102:55
how can you apply the principles which
102:58
you are just talked about so that you
103:00
still have that underlying peace and
103:03
peace of mind yes I mean when one thing
103:08
is that we have to realize because
103:11
someone else has an expectation of
103:13
because we have an expectation doesn’t
103:15
mean that that’s how life is going to
103:17
turn out the fact that your boss has an
103:21
expectation that you can do 50 things
103:24
doesn’t mean that you’re actually going
103:26
to be able to do 50 things so if you
103:30
sign an agreement between you and
103:33
someone to a contract for something in
103:39
the future that is essentially a concept
103:41
that you and the other person have about
103:43
how life in the future will look but
103:46
life in the future may not have anything
103:49
to do with how you and the other person
103:51
have agreed it will look so we take our
103:56
concept about how life should
103:58
look and the concept of the other and
104:00
say okay well we’ve agreed on it so now
104:02
this is how it has to turn out and so if
104:06
someone breaches the contract we look at
104:09
them and say you’ve reached the contract
104:11
where it’s actually another way of
104:12
looking at it his life has turned out
104:14
the way it was destined to turn out and
104:16
in the story of life it was destined for
104:21
a contract to be put in place that says
104:23
hey you and I think life should turn out
104:24
this way
104:25
and in practice life turns out according
104:28
to how life is going to turn out which
104:29
could be very different so going back to
104:34
this just because your boss has an
104:36
expectation doesn’t mean that that’s
104:39
what God has in mind
104:42
so we sometimes need to align with a
104:49
more accurate relationship to life
104:53
rather than just believing what society
104:56
is telling me how life should look now
104:59
this could be problematic we say well if
105:03
I do this I’m going to lose my job and
105:04
if I lose my job I won’t be able to look
105:08
after my family so there is that
105:15
consideration but if you find that your
105:22
attitude of buying into what your boss
105:27
is saying has to happen which may not be
105:29
possible is now creating your absence of
105:34
peace of mind and you’ve decided what
105:41
your priority in life is then it might
105:45
no longer make sense for you to carry on
105:49
that story um you might need to start
105:52
making changes so it depends on whether
105:55
your priority is my happiness my
105:59
completeness is dependent on outcomes or
106:03
whether your priority is my completeness
106:07
is not dependent on outcomes my
106:09
completeness is dependent on pieces
106:11
mind so if that if that becomes your
106:15
priority then you say well actually I
106:17
don’t need to deliver what my boss says
106:22
I need to deliver because delivering
106:25
what my boss says I need to deliver is
106:27
essentially my way of getting the
106:31
outcome that I feel is essential for my
106:33
completeness now this is a very big step
106:40
to take it requires a big leap of faith
106:45
it requires us to become very clear on
106:48
what our real objective in life is is it
106:53
outcomes or is it peace of mind um what
106:57
I found is that when the
107:01
uncomfortableness that was arising when
107:06
I was functioning in life a certain way
107:09
became strong enough there was enough
107:13
motivation to make change even if the
107:16
change had certain negative consequences
107:22
attached to it and also to my surprise
107:28
is that when Life delivered that mix
107:32
that made it possible for certain
107:36
changes to happen even when there are
107:38
negative consequences attached to her I
107:40
made the changes and to my surprise the
107:44
consequences didn’t turn out the way I
107:46
expected so in my nature I would have
107:54
said I would say to my boss look the
107:56
only way I can carry on working in this
108:00
environment is if these become my new
108:03
objectives or my new my new measurables
108:07
because under the current system I can’t
108:10
keep delivering that’s not going to be
108:14
acceptable to some people because the
108:17
consequence is too significant
108:21
I didn’t have a wife and children so my
108:26
circumstance was different maybe in the
108:29
case of someone with a particular
108:31
circumstance it just isn’t possible for
108:34
them to take that risk that’s destiny is
108:42
this running away from the situation or
108:45
can you be more peaceful and still do
108:47
the work whatever is required to be done
108:52
so the main question is how not to feel
108:54
a time pressure well you can’t not feel
108:59
time pressure if time pressure is there
109:02
so your your question is actually very
109:05
good is it possible to be at peace even
109:08
in that circumstance and the answer is
109:11
yes because our happiness is not to be
109:14
found on based on circumstance but
109:17
rather our attitude to circumstance
109:19
however what I’ve found is that and this
109:21
isn’t something I say often and it’s
109:23
very important because it in a way it’s
109:28
a nuance to what I normally say which is
109:30
your happiness isn’t to be found in
109:32
circumstance but rather your attitude to
109:34
circumstance however that doesn’t
109:37
necessarily apply if your circumstance
109:39
that you’re in is heavily supported by
109:43
the attitude of doer ship and attachment
109:47
to outcome if your circumstance was put
109:51
in place essentially because of doer
109:52
ship and attachment to outcome then I
109:55
feel that that circumstance needs to
109:58
change if however the doer ship and
110:01
attachment to outcome is not part of the
110:03
circumstance then the peace can be there
110:08
because we realize that the outcome is
110:11
part of life unfolding destiny God’s
110:14
will my capacity is part of life’s will
110:20
and destiny and the circumstance I find
110:23
myself part of life’s world destiny
110:25
which means in each moment do exactly
110:28
what you can do and then leave the
110:33
outcome up to
110:34
god that means that if you find that you
110:42
work less quickly and then you get fired
110:47
from your job the attitude needs to be
110:51
not that was terrible advice from Roger
110:54
I hate him it needs to not be oh I’m
110:59
such a failure I should have been able
111:01
to work harder but rather an attitude
111:05
that sees everything that happened as
111:08
part of life this is the outcome and now
111:14
you move on from there
111:16
what will happen next is you will look
111:19
for new jobs and hopefully you’ll get
111:21
one that might be even better
111:25
but if you are in prison if you are in a
111:29
slave camp let’s say very unfortunate
111:33
circumstance and you can’t do anything
111:35
to change the circumstance your piece is
111:38
still there if the attitude is this is
111:41
all a happening not my doing not the
111:44
doing of the captors my destiny and I
111:49
understand that my happiness isn’t to be
111:51
found and outcomes so there needs to be
111:53
a grounding into that place inside that
111:56
is at peace even in that circumstance
111:59
and that place inside is there is a
112:03
place inside that is at peace even in
112:06
very unfortunate circumstance however if
112:09
we’re continually trying to perform a
112:12
certain way then that insistence on us
112:17
performing a certain way can be the veil
112:19
that covers up that peace of peace
112:21
inside so if that’s the case at some
112:26
point we need to see it and say no I
112:28
can’t keep buying into how life should
112:33
look even my own my own idea of how I
112:36
should perform
112:44
so the talks are going to happen for the
112:48
next 11 days now everyone’s welcome to
112:52
attend as often as you like but for
112:56
today I think we’ll call it a day